The talk - on improvement needed !

I wrote:
It appears you do not wish to communicate nor participate in any of the promises you made when you requested to move in. Yes I DO wish to communicate and participate in the promises and mutual agreements we both made per my moving in Kathi. This is two weeks notice that I will need to see some improvements before the next evaluation on whether this arrangement will continue to work or if you will need to find an alternative solution to residence. I understand this two weeks notice your mentioning here. Though we both know I have no wish to find another residence to move to.

I asked you to put in a more daylight schedule, and you get up at 930 at night, sleeping all day. I don't think you are awake enough during the day to know someone has come here every day to let Jean Luc out and has been checking his water bowl since the day he had no water at all in it. No I was not aware that someone other than you or I was in the house as I do not make it a habit to be in the other parts of the house except to go downstairs to use the restroom/shower there and or use the kitchen area since you started your day job@Tracker. Jean Luc never let on that someone had been in the house as he does when you come home, ect. That one day is the ONLY day I let the water bowl not be noticed weather or not you believe this I know it's true. Sorry it happened and it was NOT intentional on my part at all.

I don't feel I have asked for a lot. No you have not asked me for alot at all Katie, far from it. The only times you offer to help or do anything is when you figure you have angered me, then you do only enough to figure you have appeased me at the moment. I am sorry you view it this way, as it isn't true. Most of the time I am lost as in what it is to do alone, as this stuff isn't mine and so without you I get lost in the tarot, though I HAVE scanned and emailed alot to you since I got the 3in1 software finally installed off of the HP website as the CD it came with wouldn't work for whatever reason I still have no clue on this. I have a world of patience and tolerance; however, you are increasingly being insensitive toward anything I feel important or needs addressed, continuing to keep a schedule that is not adequate for sleep and a schedule of work, should you have had a job or experience other than 4 walls and a bed/computer.

I can't continue to jump up every hour or two for Jean Luc to get back into bed and work at what I am doing. The work is too hard mentally and when I get stressed, I get sick, and start having issues. I am starting to feel the physical stress on my body/nerves due to being tired from up and down and my early hours. I am sorry your feeling stressed and feeling I am part of the reason hurts as I have no intention on causeing you harm in any way by any thing to do with me Katie.

I have tried to be kind, but you are becoming more flip, demanding, and negligent of things which were to happen during the stay. I was not aware of being flip, or demanding Kathi. I have given you things to help both food wise, gift wise, etc, but this appears to make no difference and you continue on. Yes your gifts of help in food and gifts are SO appreciated as I never expected them in the first place I DO appreciate them Katiei. I have not asked you to participate in a family type relationship as you have your own agenda and we both like the computer too well. Katie I wasn't aware of a family type relationship being offered or wanted on your part, I myself am just surviving day to day, making my grades to work towards getting my Associates and the recent new things I don't know back so I can work from home again as I have before. Yes we both like our computers alot and the time spent on them by each of us I am in total agreement with you on this, it's also why I do my best NOT to disturb you when your on yours and or disturb you when I need to use the kitchen and or go downstairs to the restroom there. I have been trying to stay out of the way as much as possible cause I dont see it as my place to be out where I feel in the way if your cousin comes over or even to say what do you want done if you would let me know when you want me out with you to do the things we discussed when I first moved in I wont have any issues doing such Katie, specially when you had offered the cut in rent for doing such, though I am not saying this is why I am willing to help. Just give me a time frame of when you would be wanting me out of my room to help you with stuff and or even WHAT you would possibly like me to do certain things. Also I keep my door open and Jean Luc comes and goes as he pleases while your at your day job Katie, so I havent been ignoring him and HAVE been taking him outside more than regularly as I have seen you doing so yourself.

I have let this slide in hopes you would get it together and decide you could put into the efforts requested - sheets ON the bed would be a great start. The sheets have been on the bed since sometime this past week Katie. If you are not able to put them on, I will put them on for you as the mattress pad on the bed was new and never slept on prior to you, and I do not wish it ruined. I have no wish to ruin the property you have supplied me with in the furnished room either Katie, I took the sheets off when I went through my clothes during my period to wash them immediately so as not to stain the sheets. If you need a plastic liner due to heavy menses, I can provide that as well. No I have no need for a plastic liner for the bed Katie. I sleep on my blanket as it is dark and when I myself purchased a liner it bothered me more than helped. I haven't seen one turd picked up in the back yard, that you claimed you would be doing if I got the pooper scooper. Are you saying you would like me to go out and pick up after Jean Luc with the pooper scooper on a regular basis Katie? When I mentioned the scooper thing it was cause during the ice storm we were both stepping in his droppings trying to take the pics you wanted of the storm damage. Just let me know on this please.

As I stated, I will give 2 weeks then we can evaluate the desire of whether or not you wish to stay or move along. At this venue, I will NOT give any good references, as I feel that would not be honest, if it be your desire to go. I am not asking you to leave, don't get me wrong. I just have asked a few changes be made and they have fallen on deaf ears. This email isnt falling on deaf ears at all Katie, I hear you loud and clear and appreciate your saying your not asking me to move.

Evidently, as stated, you do not wish to talk about issues, so we will communicate thus, and each do our own, as has been. I do so with to communicate Katie, just dont know how to or when to if not approached by you as it's not my way to seek out bothering you, it was hard for me to even mention the shower head thing downstairs, in the end after speaking to/with you on it I felt bad for doing such as it seemed to have irked you, but I thought on it as I didn't know you well enough to make such a judgement so I just let it alone. Pictures and scans are only done on your schedule, when you think I am aggravated over something. I could teach you a lot on eBay, etc, but you don't want to learn or know things, and it is a moot point for me to try to list when I never know what I will be given, or when you will be up to pictures or scans. I don't ask as not to interfere with your schooling or schedule of plans but I do know you do not do school work all night until just prior to my getting up, but that is when your lights go off and you are down for the day. Please let me know time frames and whatnot, I dont feel comfortable listing things for you on your ebay if this is your meaning Katie but I am fine and happy in doing the scans and the pic taking if this is still your wish of me to do so while renting the room from you<>
If you have grievances, you can give me those and I can address those from my end. If you have a scheduled time to visit Michigan, that can be factored into the equation for re-evaluation. As far as we know the time frame for my next visit is at the end of May. Have you ever considered you set yourself up for failure on a living situation by your behaviors? I don't nickle and dime you for every little thing, that is wrong, but I would like more assistance from you and a few of the campaign promises you made honored. No I wasnt aware I set myself up for failure Katie, I dont wish to relocate from this room at this date nor any sooner than my eventual move permanently to Michigan sometime before the new year gets close. As I have said above give me time frames you wish my assistance in the scans and pics of shoes and whatnot and I have no issues doing such as it benifits me in the end per our original agreement on doing such Katie, this I understand and in fact have no issues with doing as I can work my school courses around the times you let me know of.As far as communicating via email I have no issues with doing such but I also am fully able to hold a conversation with you on such issues face to face and not let things fall apart.Also YOU ARE very much appreciated Katie, I am not trying to take you or what you offer me for granted in ANY way at all. I am deeply sorry it seems to have come across as such to you. Whatever it is I can do with you to mend this please let me know, just cause my door is closed doesn't mean I am asleep. Alot of the time it's closed so I wont be disturbing you even though with it closed apparently I have managed to do so anyways of which I am seriously sorry for doing such. I never considered myself a loud person, specially when I am and HAVE BEEN making a big effort to be quiet, specially when I am aware you have gone to bed. Yes I did sleep most of all Saturday, I had a huge migraine and a horrible time with a class assignment, NO excuse just a fact so you know why I didn't come out at all Saturday till late.

Saturday - Sunny,sleepy

Worked hard at work - did my first full week at Tracker, where I spent last summer. Luckily I took my info from last year so am not a total duck out of the puddle and can remember and or look up info on what screens do what, and am already making phone calls and getting old stuff cleared up from the open orders report - some from last year that didn't get dealt with.

Jabba is happily washing her crotch in the basement. She got up today and said she got up for a shower at 2 am due to being itchy....I just let it drop - if you bathed daily, you wouldn't itch, the way I see it!

The cousin came over the other day to do a load of laundry and mow the back yard. He let Jean Luc out to pee and would rotate between the back yard and laundry. She woke up, made it to the stairwell, noticed the light in the basement on and the back door open - and the lawn mower in the back yard (as well as his truck sitting in the open carport area). She went back to her room, decided she needed to pee - since the broken toilet episode upstairs and it not being secured well - a tad wobbily, the basement is the preferred toilet..... she got the new trash can I gave her for her room and peed in it!

I mean, bad enough to do it, why tell someone! I asked her why she just didn't crawl in the upstairs shower and pee in the tub and then wash it down and wash her down at the same time. I called my daughter and told her about it - she was mortified! I guess because I told her when I was in Southeast Asia, they have the squat toilets - where you sort of hover over them and go, she would use the toilet, she felt the upstairs bathroom was too compacted for her to be able to hover above the toilet - funny, I can do it, if I want....I haven't told her I put a shim under the front of the toilet to level it - why take the risk she wobble it loose?

I gave her a 2 week notice of needing some changes in her attitude and behaviors especially on sleeping all day and up all nite being noisy. She makes an effort a day or so then reverts back and forth. I am going to let it ride - she plans a trip to Michigan the end of May - Gawd give me strength! That will be like free money while she is gone and the cousin comes over everyday anyway and lets Jean Luc out cause he doesn't trust she will be awake, and checks his water dish - after the day I went ballistic on him having no water and his dish bone dry - I religiously water and feed him first thing when I get up - while he goes out to pee and before I get a shower and ready for work. Is that a lack of respect, to not make sure things are up to par?

April 13... Yee haw!

Today we had rain, snow, sleet, and more rain! went to Walmart, the one store I hate, to get a tub spout with diverter so Jabba quits taking the damn thing off to wash her crotch! I am almost ready to give the heave ho! Pissing me off a tad too much. I don't like living alone, but I am tired of the rude assed ways, staying up all nite on the GD cell phone and being self centered and "I didn't notice" toward anything. Talk about self absorbed. Working at Tracker Marine again, they were glad to see me - even the ones who were asses last year have been decent and almost friendly, even with a few conversations!

I know I am tired - the local ball team had a ballgame last nite, first of the year and did fireworks after - nothing like being woken up with crackers going off! Pissed me off, then she was up all nite going strong~ if Jean Luc would stay in bed, that would be one thing, but he don't as when he hears her, he gets up to see what is up and is up until I get him back in bed! I can't work days doing what I am doing with little sleep.

Quit the concentration camp SDS place after one week. Would have had insurance, but between the driving to Nixa, stupid no talking, and sitting like a morgue inside the concentration camp 0 they got you up 2 times a shift to hear announcements and do finger/hand exercises. Other than that, you sat with your staple remover, scotch tape, and exacto knife and worked on cleaning u medical records for scanning. I worked on what had to be Kingdom Hospital's records (from Steven King's book) for a few nights. Worked a total of 5 nites and handed in resignation. OF course, Tracker had called and offered me the summer with possibly more - longer... or I would have stayed in hell!

Will be talking to Jabba soon about her actions and lack thereof of motivation. Give me strength!